Have you Seen Joan

Rev. Harriette Cross World Thank Offering Fall 2001 “Have You Seen Joan?” II Corinthians 9:6-15 Introduction It has been about 12 years a now. I decided to take some time off from college. I was a senior at Northwestern University. I had started out in the journalism program, one of the best in the country. Yet school was not fulfilling for me. I felt that I was not doing as well as I should. During this time I was questioning my life and my purpose in life. I had just changed my major to religion. Yet I still was not happy. So on the day before I was to start my last quarter of classes before graduation, I took a long look into the darkness of my future and I had no idea of where to go. And more importantly, I had no energy to findout. I was tired of working to pay tuition, tired of writing papers, and just plain tired of what I felt to be the red tape of life. So on the day that I had to move out of my rented room for the summer, instead of registering for classes, I put my things in storage and went to a homeless shelter. The shelter in Evanston has room for 30 people. 25 men and 5 women. Usually not all of the womens beds were filled. We were allowed to stay for three months as long as we followed the rules: be in by 10 p.m., no drinking, smoking or fighting with the other guest. And you had to be ready to leave by seven in the morning. Joan was my roommate. She was from Milwaukee. She was 34 years old with two children. As I got to know her, I also discovered that she was addicted to cocaine and alcohol, and had been diagnosed as mentally ill. In the shelter, we would usually say that everybody had their own sad story of why they were homeless. I actually never asked the details leading up to Joan coming to Chicago from Milwaukee. But I never felt that I had to. After three months of rooming in the shelter, Joan and I were given a transitional apartment. We were allowed to stay there for free as to save up money to make a deposit on an apartment. The whole experience had a profound effect on me because it taught me a lot about how we relate to each other as people. Today, we hear a lot about homelessness. I think that social service aganecies and themedia have created this image of who homeless people are and how society should deal with them - as if homelessness is just a problem to be solved. During the time that I was homeless, I went on with my daily activities. I went to work, and studied, and was active in several social clubs. But I was able to listen to people with a new perspective. I listened to many conversations about homelessess. And was amazed that many people had so many simple situations for what they saw as the problem. Perhaps if we had enough affordable housing, or enough jobs, or enough homes then there would be no homelessness. Or perhaps if we could just raise the self esteem of the people and teach them a better way of life, then things would be okay. I remember listening to a speech given my a man in agony, as he spoke about a lady that he saw sitting on a parkbench. He was literally in tears as he told our group of his sorrow for not taking the lady to a shelter. He felt that her whole life was ruined because he did not help her. I remember being so frustrated because I could not help but to wonder why he was placing judgement on a lady that he had not even bothered to talk to. He really did not know what her situation was, or if she even needed to go to a shelter. And I will never forget the time I was at the library and I saw a friend collecting soup cans for the homeless. And chuckled to myself, because I knew that most of the homeless people that I knew, did not have can openers, much less stoves to cook soup on. I feel that it is so important to talk about my experience because we all tend to depend so much on our impressions and understandings as we try to help people. Yet we never go any further than that. To be charitable looks good onour Christian resume. So we give to causes in hopes that they are making a difference. Yet what are we really giving to people? And Why? But anyway, to continue my story. In the early days of Joan and I living together we got along fine. One of the first things that she did was write an article about her experience for the Chicago Tribune. We talked about her story the night before her deadline. Her words have stuck with me all of this time, because I felt that they also related to my own life. In her interviewing other people in the shelter for the story, she realized that if they were to shut the shelter down and to tell us all to go home. Not one person would be at a lostfor where to go. For instance, often my friend Isaac would take me to his sister’s house where he lived during the day, and we would both check into the shelter at night. Yet everyone had a reason for living in the shelter. Joan went on to say that the search for a homeless shelter is not really a search for a physical bed,or food or clothing. I knew a lot of people who did not have the patience to deal with all of the schemes, and drugs, etcthat went on in the shelter, and they just preffered to sleep on a park bench. Most people who chose to walk down the “tramp trail” as living in a shelter was affectionately called are on a spiritual journey. They are looking for a spiritual bed, spiritual covering and spiritual food. I was not born a Methodist. The seeds of my decision to devote my life to the Methodist Church began in the help that I received during that time in my life. That was the church that provided for me all of those things when I needed them. The mystery of God was not in the physical help that I had received. It was in the grace that I felt. For the first time in my life I felt that I did not have to behave in a certain way or do a certain thing in order to get the things that I needed to survive. I didn’t have to earn my keep or answer any questions. I was just taken care of. One day, a Methodist minister brought his campus ministry group to the shelter to worship with us. Afterward the service he came up to me and told me that I appeared to be such a happy person, with such a glow on my face. I think it was just the reflection of my bright purple Northwestern sweatshirt. Yet that was something that I needed to hear. Because after he said thatto me, I didn’t need to be in the shelter anymore. I could finally take that next step forward into a new life. I have often wondered if the people who volunteered to help us realized that many people go the the shelters in search of the same things that people who haven’t lost their patience with society would go to church. As members of the shelter grew together and developed a sense of community, we would open up to one another and share our stories. And they were not stories of houses burning down, or robbers taking everything. They were stories of significant relationships in our lives breaking down. They were stories of marriages falling apart, or alienation from parents and families, or dealing with the death of someone close. Every single one of us was on a journey in search of something that they lacked either spiritually or emotionally as a result of that loss. Some people can get spiritual fulfillment from going to work everyday, or going to church, or spending time with family and friends. WE can get fulfillment by having normal relationships. But when those relationships go wrong,many people seek the tramp trail. It is called a trail because most people go from one shelter to another. Once they have stayed the maximum days at one place, they go to another. They tell their sad story t o one person after antoher,and after a while they get good at getting over on the system. And once you get to the point where you have been in the system for awhile, and you learn that you canbe taken care of for free, a lot of people get accustomed to that lifestyle. They let others do for them, what they are capable of doing for themselves. Unfortunately, that is why today, I just don’t have a whole lot of sympathy for homelessness as a cause. I don’t think that it a normal problem with a normal solution. My experience is not common. I am one of the few people who chose to get out of the system. Many of those people that I knew then, are still going from shelter to shelter today. And in some ways shelters support the addictions and dysfunctions that put people there in the first place. My passion has been for the church that saved me. My passion has been to go back to all of those nice church people who saved me with one request. And that request is that in the midst of all of your giving to help people to please give them Christ. As you address the physical issues of life, also address the underying spiritual issues. It is okay to tell people that Christ lives them. It is okay to lead people to Christ. It is okay to witness about the salvation of Christ. Because that is what people need to hear. II Corinthians chapter nine reminds us that God has given to us in abudance so that we can give to others in abundance. And I don’t think that abundance is just about the amount of money that we give, or the time, or service. That abundance that we have been given is the love and grace of God in our lives. We are here because God has given us the grace to hear and feel love in his presence and in his words. We have been blessed because we don’t need to search for a place of grace and love, we come to it weekly. People all over the world have been able to respond to the good news of God’s love through Christ. The United Methodist church especially is a church that is dedicated to mission. To putting our faith into action to help others, not only in this country, but all over the world. And I think that we can be grateful for United Methodist Women who spend so much time not only in mission, but in promoting the understanding of what it means to give, what we are giving to, and why it is important to help in that cause. Paul says that the service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of God’s people, but is also overflowing with many expressions to thanks to God. Our service and our gifts are not only helping others, but itgives us an opportunity to say thank you to God. For everything about our lives is a gift giving freely from God. We didn’t have to earn it, but we can say thank you. Joan and I eventually moved out of our apartments. Joan went back to Milwaukee and I went back to school to finish my last quarter. We did not part on good terms. Eventually her addictions caused a lot of tension between us. As I would walk downtown I would see a lot of the men that Joan constantly had over our house. And we would always ask each other “Have you seen Joan”. And unfortunately, no one has seen Joan since she left. But my experience of living with Joan has taught my to say thank you to God with all of my life, for all that I have. How can you say thank you for what God has given you?