A Gathering of Two or Three

Sermon A Gathering of Two or Three Whenever I teach a class with youth or children, one of the first things that we do after prayer is establish a behaviorial covenant. While we are together, how do we treat one another. How do we want to be treated in the class and how do we pledge to treat others. If we were to establish a covenant for our congregation, what are some of the things that we would put into it. You don’t have to answer out loud, but just give it some thought. The Stop-and-Think Chair - Matthew 18:15-20 Schools opened here last week, and I remembered something from one of the teachers. Like all good teachers, she has certain expectations — norms of behavior — for her students. The students agree to these community norms for the classroom that are posted in the room. That’s not new. What I find intriguing in her classroom is the consequence if someone breaks the norm. When a community rule is broken, the offending student is assigned to the clearly labeled stop-and-think chair. There the child sits ruminating upon certain actions and considering what he or she needs to do to return to the classroom community. I wonder if that would work in other settings — like the nation’s capitol or home and yes, the church. It’s a silly thought, but still. Imagine if all communities — even, or especially, those where there is so much blood being shed against one another, so much violence flowing out of their lives — imagine if all communities had a public spot designated for the stop-and-think chair. You’ve heard of stop, drop, and roll in a fire? How about stop, think, and pray in a conflict? You don’t have to be humiliated with a dunce cap; just stop and think. When we allow for a moment of reflection, it often provides enough space for consideration of another path. Such silence becomes a container for the Spirit of God to intervene in surprising ways.... Luckily, for followers of Christ, we don’t have to get lost in our thoughts about the subject, because in Matthew 15 – Jesus has already spelled out the covenant. We should always remember to treat people with love. Matthew 15 is all about reconciliation with God’s world. The key to reconciliation – getting back together is forgiveness. We will talk more about forgiveness more next week. Today, we talk about how to deal with a situation when you are upset, especially with a church member. How to use the church in order to bring reconciliation. The behavioral covenant for the church – Someone paraphrased….. 1. Put Your Complaint into Words 2. Tell the Person about It in Person 3. Counsel with Other Wise Christians. 4. Make Use of the Christian Fellowship. 5. Never Give up Trying Where 2 or three are gathered, Christ is also with them. Christ is here to bring all of the world back into God’s love. 2 or three can bring power, but it can also bring pain. It is inevitable – whether we are a family, a church or just a gathering. Wherever 2or 3 are gathered, there is going to be some form of woundedness, someone is going to feel hurt, someone is going to feel offended, someone is going to feel victimized. Whereever 2or 3 are gathered there is going to be sin – jealousy, resentment, nosiness. Sin is something in your life that at the moment is more important to you than God and God’s commandment to love one another. Where 2or 3 are gathered there is sin – but in the midst of it all there is also love. Because there is Jesus Christ in the midst. If you look at Matthew 18 – it spells out the rules for confronting sin within the Christian community. Confronting sin means stop pretending that there is nothing wrong. Whatever it is, it needs to come out in the open. A story of 4 friends Four friends gathered for lunch after church as they did every Sunday. They went into their favorite café to talk. They had gathered for so long – that the conversation could go anywhere. They could be talking about their gardens and which vegetables didn’t come up this year. They could be talking about the new sewing project one had started, they could be talking about the new garage one just had designed. Then the conversation flows to more practical issues – the sermon they heard, the music the choir sang. Today as the four picked their seat – one noticed that there was a young man at the table next to them – sitting all alone. She seemed to have recognized him – she could see the family resemblance – she must have known his father. But she too immediately got into the conversation. The conversation always goes from church business to church gossip. And she had a good one to talk about – Patty. Patty was in the choir with her, but when she saw her at the grocery store last Saturday she did not even speak. It seems that every since Patty inherited that money from uncle, she has become very stuck up. She doesn’t talk to anyone. But this time our friend was offended. She did not appreciate this treatment at all. Did you speak to Patty? Asks one of the friends. This person obviously didn’t understand the situation. If you noticed what was going on with Patty did you speak to Patty. As the friend looks away – she notices the gaze of the young man at the next table – he is looking right at her, his eyes seem sad, even a little concerned. But he is very quiet. As her attention goes back to her friends- and the conversation she is upset but she listens to their advice. Maybe you should just go to Patty and ask her what is going on. You never know until you talk with her. If you sense there there is a problem talk with her – afterall, we are church members. Jesus calls us to forgive one another and to resolve our differences. When we feel that we have been hurt – Jesus asks us not to dwell in the pain – but to go directly to the person and resolve the issue. If you cant resolve the issue between the two of you – take some others with you. Afterall – Jesus reminds us that he is always with us – where two or three are gathered his presence is there. And suddenly it came to her – she recognized the young man at the table- he did indeed look just like his father. Whom she knew so well also. But she also realized why her relationships with those in her church were so important. Because wherever those relationships were present – so was that young man who looked so familiar. That young man was Jesus Christ himself. Jesus says that where 2 or 3 are gathered, so is Christ. The combination of us and Christ unleashes a powerful spirit. In the face of God we have to put aside our selfishness, our pride, our predjudice and the the holy spirit reign in the situation. You have to realize that you love God more than you love being right. Because whatever it is that hold your spirit, hold you. There is a Russian saying that we need to make peace with people and make war with our sin. Sometimes even in the church we like to do the opposite. Forgiveness is a choice to put our future in God’s hands. Oprah said forgiveness is finally realizing that whatever it was that happened in the past, there is nothing you can do to change it. I would add that forgiveness is the decision to put it all in God’s hands. Forgiveness is the choice to leave the past behind and to live in God’s future. Christ calls us not to get so caught up in the way things are, and to embrace the way things can be. To create heaven here on earth – just in your attitude. To free ourselves of whatever it is that is holding us back. I think a lot of us struggle with forgiveness and reconciliation because we think that we are granting the other person a favor. Forgiveness is never about the other person it is always about us. It is taking care of our spirit, it is freeing ourselves from the pain of holding on to memories. And opening the door to a new freedom. Forgiveness is the first step towards reconciliation. Reconcilation is the doorway toward a deeper relationship with God. The whole point of the bible – Life happens, Life hurts, whatever it is in order to move forward you need to get over it and move on. Moving on can take a long time, but God calls us to get to that point. I remember once filing a grievance against a colleague. I was allowed to tell me story, and the colleague apologized. My DS said that once the person apologized, that I had to accept the apology and let it go. Of course, I accepted the apology in the moment – but it took years to move on. That colleague and I will never be friends again, but we are siblings in Christ, apology accepted. God calls us to move on, not for their sake, but for ours. In the covenant that Jesus gives us in Matthew 18:15-20 – it is the person who feels wrong that takes the first step. 1. Put Your Complaint into Words 2. Tell the Person about It in Person 3. Counsel with Other Wise Christians. 4. Make Use of the Christian Fellowship. 5. Never Give up Trying In this model, it is the church that helps the person to heal. Jesus gives the church to keys to eternal life. The church has great power – Jesus says that whatever is bound in earth will be bound in heaven, whatever is freed on earth is freed in heaven. God invites the church to do the important work of reconciliation. Every since Adam and Eve got kicked out of the garden of eden, God’s primary ministry has been to bring us back together in reconciliation and love. God has been calling us all to come together, to heal one another, to walk with one another to a new future. To be an example of wholeness. We are never going back to the way things were in the garden of eden. The bible says that there are angels guarding the garden to make sure that no one ever returns. But God sent Christ into the world to bring us forward to a new life, a new understanding, a new eden where tears will never flow and where there will be eternal life in the presence of God. Learning to live in love, the resolve conflicts in love, to do the work of community, to be a part of a church is God’s invitation to join in God’s work of reconciliation. Building Bridges Once upon a time, two brothers who lived on adjoining farms fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in their 40 years of working together. It began with a small misunderstanding, and grew into a major difference, and finally exploded into an exchange of bitter words followed by weeks of silence. One morning, there was a knock on John's door. He opened it to find a man with a carpenter's toolbox. "I'm looking for a few days' work," he said. "Perhaps you would have a few small jobs here and there that I could help with? Yes," said the older brother. "I do have a job for you. Look across the creek at that farm. That's my younger brother! Last week, there was a meadow between us, but he took his bulldozer and dug a small river between us. Well I'm going to do him one better. See that pile of old lumber? I want you to build an 8 foot high fence between us. Then I won't need to see his place or his face anymore." The carpenter said, "Show me the nails and the tools, and I'll do a good job for you." The older brother had to go to town, so he left for the day. At sunset, when he returned, this eyes opened wide, and his jaw dropped. There was no fence there at all. The carpenter had built a bridge that stretched from one side of the river to the other, with handrails and all! And his younger brother, was coming toward them, his hand outstretched. "You're quite the guy," he said, "after all I've said and done." The two brothers met in the middle, and shook each other's hand. They turned to see the carpenter leaving. "No, wait! Stay a few days. I've a lot of other projects for you," said the older brother. "I'd love to," the carpenter said, "but I have many more bridges to build." When you and I come to the end of our days, just remember this: God won't ask what kind of car we drove, but He will ask how many people we helped get where they needed to go. He won't ask how big our house was, but He will ask how many people we welcomed into our home. God won't ask what neighborhood we lived in, but He will ask how we treated our neighbors. And He won't ask how many fences we made, but He will ask how many bridges we built. Bob Tasler, Restoration: Confronting the Brother What bridges do you need to build? Let us pray….